Freed's best day ever
by LaxusPlayer
Summary: You only turn 21 once, and Freed is no exception to that rule. So what would be the best birthday present a young rune mage could get? Why spending the whole day with his favourite person in the world; Laxus Dreyar.
1. The Beginning of a great idea

Freed's best day ever

_A/N: So I haven't done one of these in a while and I figured I would. Also I haven't done anything about Freed really and I love the guy, so here goes. Thoughts are in italics..._

Freed awoke at his usual time of 5:00am with a huge smile on his face. "_That dream was amazing! Who knew that Master Laxus could be so caring, or so gentle when it came to *_scene missing*_. I wonder how he is doing at this very moment..._"

Hopping out of bed, he immediately got to work resetting his covers to their previous position. Indeed this is why he always woke up at this hour; getting ready and sorting his flat to its usual state was a task that took him at least three hours. Did he do this to music I hear you ask? Well sometimes, but on this particular day, like many others, his thoughts were more directed towards...

"_...and that would give the Thunder Legion an efficiency increase of at least two percent! Plus it would save us exactly three jewels per annum! Master Laxus will be so impressed with this plan! Now with regards to the washing of his coat, I believe I should..._"

_-At the guild hall-_

The time was five minutes to quarter to 10:00am, which was when Freed usually arrived at the guild, and everyone was amassing the presents on the bar. After all today was a very special day.

"Maybe if you move Natsu and Lucy's presents to the left and right a little you may be able to squeeze your present right in the middle of them." Mira told Cana.

The card mage nodded and slid her suspiciously bottle-shaped present right next to the poorly wrapped books and the completely unwrapped green scarf. "Reckon he's going to like them all?"

"I don't think it will matter what we get him." Mira smiled then nodded towards the two considerably larger presents on the floor in front of them. "So long as those three get him something good, I'm sure he'll be ecstatic. Especially if..."

"The fuck is all this shit?!" Laxus yelled, casually strolling into the guild hall with a puzzled look on his face. "Did someone die? Is it Macao?! Please tell me its Macao!"

Bickslow laughed. "Yeah very funny Master, now you can put your stuff right at the front there."

The Thunder God blinked. "What stuff? Was I supposed to be getting stuff?"

"Yeah the present." Evergreen told him, although judging by his facial expression she was beginning to think the worst. "You did remember right?"

"Remember...remember...erm, what am I remembering?"

The pair groaned in unison. "God I knew he would forget!"

"This is why we should have stapled a note to his forehead!" Bickslow whined before being grabbed by his master.

"Forget what? What the hell are you idiots...?"

"IT'S FREED'S 21st YOU IDIOT!" They yelled at him and horror dawned on his face.

"...shit that's today?!" Everyone in the guild could feel the internal cringe coming from the S-Class mage. "Why the hell didn't you remind me?!"

"We did remind you!"

"Every day for the last month!"

"At least three times a day!"

"We even wrote it in the sk-..." Their rant was cut short when the birthday boy himself walked straight into the guild. "Ohhhh here he is! Better think of something quick!"

"Good morning everyone." Freed smiled, delivering his usual greeting despite his excitement. "I see you have amassed quite a collection of presents for me."

Mira immediately slid in front of the bumbling dragon slayer to give him time to think. "Yes we have Freed and I hope you like them all! Now, who's do you want to open first?"

"_Not me not me not me not me!_" Laxus prayed silently whilst maintaining his poker face.

Luckily Freed's subconscious stepped up to save him. "Well I think I shall save the gifts from my team until last."

And so the present opening began. Natsu's was obviously the green scarf, just like Happy's was the canned tuna. Lucy and Levi had both provided him with the same copy of "Runes Runes Runes: The Extended Edition" which caused a small argument to break out, and was only solved when Cana's mysterious alcoholic liquid was distributed to the group. Of course Freed didn't drink any himself since he wanted to fully enjoy his Master's present, but everyone else did. The affects varied from temporary blindness to extreme hallucinations. Cana had never been more proud.

Well, everyone with the exception of... "So...considering the rest of the guild appear to be in some sort of comatose state, would you mind giving me my present now Master Laxus?"

"_Shit I thought I would have more time with this! Ok man you've got this, just think of something like you usually do. Like that time you got Jellal out of paying for that drink driving fine. I still can't believe they throw people in jail for murde-...wait, that's it!_" Popping his collar, Laxus put on his trademark grin and cleared his throat. "Well I thought long and hard about it, but then I realised something; I already am the perfect present. After all, how could you ever receive something better than the gift of me?"

The rune mage thought about it for half a minute before giving up. "I am sorry Master Laxus but I have no idea what that means."

Laxus laughed. "It's simple you idiot; you've got me for the day. I'll do whatever stupid shit you want me to do with you until it hits midnight."

"Just like Cinderella then?" Wendy asked, strolling into the guild hall and quietly adding her gift to the others.

"Albeit with a hell of a lot more awesome, but sure why not." He shrugged then looked at the birthday boy. "Sound good to you?"

All Freed could manage was a shaky thumbs up and a "A-A-Are you sure about-..."

"Yes I'm sure, that's why I suggested it you idiot!" Laxus snorted. "Now pick something to do already."

"Um...well what would you...?"

"Freed who's birthday is it today?"

"M-Mine."The green haired wizard flashed a smile before returning to his broken stuttering.

"Correct." His master rolled his eyes and patted him on the back. "Now pick something you want to do with me. Anything you want."

Instantly several 18+ thoughts flashed through Freed's head, causing him to start drooling. Thankfully Laxus had nothing better to do, and so he simply waiting until his friend calmed down. "Well...there is a new book shop I wanted to check out..."

The blonde groaned internally but nodded. "Sounds like a plan to me."

Thus Freed's best day ever began.

_A/N: So this is being a multi-chapter thing because why not?_


	2. Hitting the Books

Hitting the Books

_A/N: Here's the second part. The Freed dorkiness intensifies..._

"What is it?"

"Sorry?"

"What the hell is it?"

"I...I don't follow what you..."

"What the hell is so damned interesting that you have to keep looking back at me every two steps? Do I have something on my face?"

"Um...not that I can see."

"Good, then stop staring at me like I'm some kind of freak."

"O-Ok Master Laxus." Freed's head snapped forward as his blush deepened. This was somewhat strange since he had totally not been looking at his friend on and off for the past five minutes. Like at all. He barely even noticed how the sun shone on the blonde's face, illuminating it to give it an almost god like texture. And the fact that his scar was especially distinct in this lighting too was also lost to him. Such a shame really...

"Where is this damned shop then?" Laxus grunted, folding his arms and scowling. "_Jeez if something doesn't happen soon I think I'll go back to trying to kill people._"

The rune mage's brain instantly started working over time. "_No he looks bored! I knew I should have picked an activity he liked to keep him entertained!_" Looking back he smiled shakily. "We could always go somewhere el-..."

"Finish that sentence and I'll finish your life."

"_I know its around here somewhere!_" Freed frantically began searching for any sign of the shop. "I-I think we are close. I know it is near to..."

"Is that it over there?" Laxus said, pointing to the literally glowing shop that was surrounded by many obvious signs.

The birthday boy squealed with delight. "Excellent work Master Laxus! Once again you have proven yourself to be a cut above the rest of us!"

The thunder god rolled his eyes. "Dude if you hadn't spent half the time looking at me you would have found it easily. Speaking of which why were you staring at me."

Busted! "Erm...well the walk was a fair distance and I was c-concerned you may have fallen behind and gotten lost."

"Freed that's bullshit and you know it." His eyes glinted in the sunlight. "We both know the real reason."

Instantly Freed's face flushed to nuclear proportions. "W-We do?"

"You're scared I'm gonna ditch you and back out on the present!" Laxus' triumphant smile quickly faded upon hearing his friend's nervous laugh of relief. "Hey what's so funny?"

"Nothing Master Laxus I assure you." Freed replied, struggling to keep the smile from his lips. "_Thankfully he is not a mind reader as well as a genius._"

"Good." He said warily, still suspicious. So suspicious in fact that he grabbed Freed's shoulder to stop him right outside the door. "Look man its your birthday today. Your 21st at that. Its a big day and there's no way I'd try something as shitty as backing out on you. Especially when its you. We clear then?"

"Master Laxus..."

"Are we clear?"

The rune mage instinctively returned to his soldier mode. "Yes Master Laxus sir!"

"Good." The lightening mage grumbled. "Now lets go and check this place out."

_-Some time later-_

"_There is no god._" Laxus sighed and readjusted himself in his beanbag cushion. "_Why did I pick today to be nice to Freed?_"

The pair had been in the library for exactly one hour, two minutes and seven seconds. It had started out pretty well for Laxus really. A few people in the shop recognised him and cowered away in fear, but after a while everyone seemed to get over the fact that the S-Class mage was actually there. Next he took to the books, but all of them looked too boring for his taste. I mean who the hell actually cares about the intricate knowledge of rune making?!

Oh that's right, the idiot he was stuck with. Freed on the other hand was having the time of his life. With all his time being spent on organising the Thunder God Tribe, going on quests and helping everyone out, he hadn't had the time to even peer through the window of the shop. But now he was actually inside the place, he couldn't believe how much of a paradise it actually was. Comfortable chairs, well lit places, plenty of small reading spaces and shelves and shelves of all the latest and most detailed books about runes. Along with a few weekly copies of the latest "Hottest Peeps in Fiore" but he was saving them for when his Master wasn't looking.

In fact, speaking of his master... "Freed how long are you going to be?"

He almost jumped out of his skin and dropped the book he was reading. "S-Sorry Mast Laxus, I was just checking up on the latest edition of 'Runes and Regulations'. See the title is a pun of 'rules and regulations', which is funny because..." Laxus' glare stopped him dead. "...we can leave right away."

The blonde grunted. "Well are you done here?"

"Yes I am."

"Freed you're a shit liar so don't even bother."

"But if you are bored then we should..."

"Ignore it and let you look at these shitty books." Laxus sighed, his willpower keeping him from blowing the place up. "_Ok now think...what could you do in a book shop apart from scare people do death? Hmm...punch the clerk in the...nah. Blowing stuff up always seems to work? Freed may get upset though and that's..._"

"Would you like me to read to you?"

Laxus blinked. "What?"

"You do not seem to be well acquainted with this area of magic so I..." The rune mage shuffled uncomfortably, instantly regretting his boldness.

"Sure."

"Indeed we shall leave right aw-...what?!" He gawked at his master, who had folded his arms and closed his eyes in mental preparation.

"Just pick a book and read it."

Hundreds of titles flew through his mind. "_Pick something he would like! Wait, that leaves...nothing that you read. Excellent job Freed. Oh wait; what about the book about the lightening runes! That could be...that is off the table. He would die of boredom before I finished the first paragraph. Think think think! I suppose I could try..._"

Suddenly a book was thrust into his hands. "Here, take this one." Freed looked up to see that Laxus' eyes were still closed. "I didn't peak so surprise me."

"Ahem." The rune mage cleared his throat and turned to a random page. "...they finally left the sea, dripping of water. Their wet bodies glistened in the moonlight as he bent over for his lover. 'My body is ready.' Justin proclaimed before moaning in pleasure as Drake penet-...GAAAAAAAH!"

The book was slammed shut and dropped to the floor. By now Laxus' eyes were wide open in shock. "Well...that was..."

"Master Laxus I am so sorry and it will never happen again I promise!" Freed stammered before slowly picking up the book. Its title was 'Mission Gay-Is-Possible Three: The Horny Island', which would have had alarm bells ringing in his head had he actually read it before reading the passage. However as it was his face managed to reach a new level of redness. "A-Allow me to burn..."

Just then Laxus laughed. Not his usual mocking laughter, but an actual genuine laugh that was followed by a genuine smile. "Jesus man of all the books I could've picked, I had to pick the gay porn! Aha ha wow!" The librarians present almost shushed him for being loud, but then remembered that doing so would probably mean certain death for them.

"You...are not mad?"

"Hell no that was hilarious! Your voice is perfect for that sort of stuff. Nice and serious."

"'_Perfect'...that was a compliment! From Master Laxus!_" He grinned. "Well I shall have to read to you more often if they were that amusing." And thus Freed's heart stopped beating. "_I...oh dear lord I just said that out loud! This will be the point where he leaves and..._"

"Dude we'll do it once a fortnight or something. Get Ever and Bickslow in on it too, I'm sure they'd find this just as funny as me. Bickslow will at least, I dunno about Ever."

"A perfect plan Master Laxus!" The rune mage beamed before picking the smut up and putting it back on the shelf. "Now, is there anything else you wish to check out here?"

Laxus took one last brief look around the place before shaking his head. "Fuck no. This will be the first and only time I come in here."

"As expected." Freed laughed. "Now the time is currently eleven thirty, which is when I usually head to the bank to check over our finances. Apologies for going there a minute and a half later than usual but..."

"Wait, that's what you do in your lunch hour?!" Freed nodded. "Shit man I thought you went and looked at the pigeons or something boring. You actually work through it?"

"W-Well the finances of the Thunder God Tribe are very important..."

"Yeah and they're also pretty secure man. Do you even eat?!"

"...The queue in the bank is often..."

"Freed?"

"...Most often I do not, no."

The Thunder God shook his head. "Ok well from now on you're spending your lunch break getting some fucking lunch. That's an order."

"Y-Yes sir." He replied, bowing his head like a puppy tied to a radiator. "_How could I be so foolish as to upset him?_"

"Oh Jesus stop moping." Laxus sighed and patted him on the shoulder. "We appreciate the amount of shit you do for us, but I'd appreciate you actually surviving more I think. Now what's next on this tour of terror across the town?"

"You appreciate me?"

"...Of course I do shit head, why do you think..." He trailed off once he noticed Freed daydreaming once again. "_Great, now he's gone into idiot mode. Guess I'm stuck here waiting for him to leave._"

And wait he did, for exactly five minutes and twenty three seconds to be precise. After this time Freed cleared his throat and blushed for good measure. "Apologies my mind was somewhere else. I...I suppose the park is a nice place to..."

"Good choice." Said Laxus, picking him up and carrying him out of the door before he zapped the place out of existence. "Now which direct-...oh god dammit Freed!"

Once again Freed was in a world of his own, albeit this time in the arms of his fearless, and now rather pissed off, leader. Happy times.

_A/N: There is only so much I can have them do in one day, but any suggestions are welcome :)_


	3. Parking Mad

Parking Mad

_A/N: Ok so here is chapter 3 of this, hope you enjoy..._

Freed regained consciousness to a very warm feeling around his midriff. "_What would dare to wrestle me from my thoughts of Master...an arm?!_"

"So you're finally snapped back into it?" The rune mage looked up to see the man of his dreams. Literally. "Didn't think you'd be coming back to the world of the living any time soon if I'm honest."

"I...erm...you are carrying me..."

"No shit Sherlock." Laxus grunted and slightly moved his arm so that he could carry his subordinate more comfortably. "And don't you dare go back to that daze thing or whatever the hell you were doing."

It took Freed all of his strength to resist the urge to fangasm all over his friend's arms. "H-How long was I...?"

"About ten minutes or so."

"_Darn it Freed! You've just lost yourself ten minutes with Master Laxus! This insolence will not go...wait, why is he carrying me as though I was a bride?_" Red flushed to his face. "Master Laxus, why are you...?"

"...carrying you bridal style?" Laxus finished for him. "Well I was carrying you over my shoulder for a bit, but then I figured it'd be more comfy for you this way considering you passed out like a fuckwit aga-...OH NOT AGAIN, NO!"

Before the birthday boy could pass out again he was thrown on the ground. "I apologise..."

"God dammit Freed is it the sun or something?!" The thunder god crossed his arms and huffed. "You're not usually this...well, passy outy."

Now if there was one thing you could say about Freed Justine, it was that he was a tactical genius, a master planner, an incredible strategist. Therefore when he realised that he had to quickly and craftily conjure up an excuse for his fangirling, the response he gave was both instantaneous and brilliant... "I lose consciousness a lot from woollen fabrics." ...for all the wrong reasons.

Luckily, however, the man he was with was denser than lead. "Woollen fabrics eh? Ahhh so that's why you always pass out around me!"

"Y-Yes it is indeed. Apologies for my body being so feeble as to...M-Master Laxus, why are you removing your coat?"

Flinging it onto a nearby group of elderly men, Laxus beamed at his friend. "There we go, no more passing out now. Man you should've said something sooner and I could have ditched it at home. Come to think of it today is pretty humid anyways...may as well undo a few but-..."

"THAT WILL NOT BE NECCESSARY!" Freed yelled before he died of blood loss from his nose. "_Perhaps I should tell him I have an allergy to silk as well so he will remove his shirt..._" "P-Park!" He squeaked, desperately trying to shake the indecent thoughts from his head.

"Yes Freed, we are going to the park. We have been for the past ten minutes but I have no ide-...oh wait, there it is." He sighed as he caught sight of the Magnolia Central Park. "God this place sucks."

Magnolia Central Park was of course one of the highlights of the city. With not only one, but three fountains accompanying its array of picnic areas and amazing monuments, it truly was a sight to behold. This of course meant Laxus hated it.

"We could go somewhere else if you wish?" Freed suggested but Laxus waved the comment away.

"I carried your ass for waaaaaay too long to go somewhere else, now choose somewhere to sit and I'll grab some shitty food from one of those stalls."

Laxus then headed off to a nearby burger van, leaving Freed with an incredibly important decision. "_Why must this park contain so many benches?! Picking the ideal place for Master Laxus and myself is almost impossible! Ok now think...the first three here are suitably clean, however they are lacking an appropriate view for a meal. On the other hand the following two have a spectacular view of the field leading up to the fountain, yet from here I cannot be assured of their quality. The question now is whether I take a risk with the-..._"

The rune mage was cut off by a whistling sound behind him. Turning, he saw his present sitting on the grass nearby holding two burgers. "You were just standing there so I picked this spot. Deal with it."

"Of course Master Laxus!" He replied, rushing over and sitting next to him. "What delicacy are we dining on today then?"

"A burger with questionable meat inside it." Laxus laughed and handed him one of the two burgers. "I didn't know if you wanted any sauce so I just grabbed a bunch of packets for you."

"_So thoughtful as usual!_" Freed thought, nodding and selecting a couple of sauces to add to his burger. "_Now I must eat correctly in the presence of Master Laxus. Correct etiquette dictates that...oh, he appears to have finished his._"

Indeed he had. "Its not poisoned you know."

Freed blinked. "W-What?"

"The burger; I didn't poison this one."

"Oh ah ha ha ha ha!" Freed exclaimed melodramatically. "That was a very humorous joke!"

It was Laxus' turn to blink. "Erm yeah...are you ok man? You still seem a bit off."

"I am perfectly fine Master Laxus, thank you for asking." Freed shouted before wolfing down his burger. "See, I'm one hundred percent ok!"

"S-Sure you are man." The blonde quirked an eyebrow. "Look if something is bothering you I'm here. I mean sure I'll laugh my ass off at you if its something utterly stupid, but mostly I'll support you and stuff. So what's up?"

"N-Nothing is wrong at all Mas-..."

"Cut the bullshit Freed, something is clearly wrong." Laxus sighed. "Ok fine; I promise I won't tell anybody about what it is. I swear on the guild and rock and roll. Just tell me man."

Once again Freed had to act fast to avoid being called out. "_Ok so I can't use the coat thing again because he is no longer wearing it. Wow his body looks really defined today...FOCUS! I suppose I could go for the..._"

Luckily our green haired friend was saved by an elderly gentleman and his grandson. Being tourists in the area they knew none of the scams that the locals would try to impose on them. The current scam was them being sold free tickets to visit Fairy Tail no less; something which Laxus could not stand by and let happen. "Hold that thought buddy, I'll be right back."

"...and you'll get to see Natsu and Erza and all of the..." The man told them before he felt a huge hand collapse on his shoulder.

"Heard you were talking shit mate." Laxus told him, causing him to literally start crying with fear and run away, leaving hundreds of fliers scattered on the ground. "Apologies for him; some of the people around here are just mean. Now my name is..."

"Laxus Dreyar!" The child exclaimed, his jaw dropping in awe. "You're like the second coolest wizard in the whole of Fairy Tail!"

The Thunder God's chest puffed out. "Indeed I a-...wait, second coolest? Who's cooler than me?"

The old man chuckled. "Well my grandson has a huge obsession over runes I'm afraid, so his favourite would have to be Freed Justine. He meant you no offence of course."

Laxus grinned. "Oh none was taken. Say kid, what's you're name?"

"Its Peter Mr Dreyar."

"Well Peter, how would you like to have lunch with myself and Freed?"

The child's eyes lit up in awe. "T-T-That would be the coolest thing ever!"

The Thunder God smiled and led the two to where Freed was sitting. "Freed this is Peter and..."

"David." The old man told them. "It is an honour."

"T-The honour is mine!" Freed sprung up and bowed to the pair. "It is a pleasure to meet you two."

"I..." Peter started before trailing off in shock.

Laxus chuckled. "He's a fan. Sorry man but I have a bit of a soft spot for these kind of people."

"_So your grandfather still has a place in your heart._" Freed thought with a smile then joined in talking to the pair. Turns out the two of them weren't so bad after all, but after several signings and photos they had to leave to explore the rest of the town.

As they walked away Laxus waved. "Tell anyone about this and I'll break you."

Freed chuckled. "What, that deep inside you still have a heart of gold? Or that you have a soft spot for people that remind you of your grandfather?"

"Take your pick, both will get you killed." Laxus scowled then stood up. "Right then, so this happened. What's next on the itinerary?"

The rune mage blinked. "I-Itinerary? I recall having no such thing-..."

"Easy easy! Just messing around with you. I mean how the hell could you have planned for this?!"

"Y-Yeah...it is impossible..." Freed said sheepishly, relieved that his actual day plan hadn't fallen out of his pocket. Of course that list was back in his house somewhere but by god it existed. And needless to say not all of the activities on it included Laxus having clothes on...

"So...anywhere you fancy going? Pretty sure there's something new opening up nearby here."

"That would be the swimming pool Master Laxus." The birthday boy informed him, having thoroughly researched every area of Magnolia for no real reason. "It opened a few days ago, however I have not had someone to go with and therefore have not been."

The Thunder God grinned. "Well you have someone now don't you."

"B-But I do not have the proper attire to..."

"Fuck it we'll buy some there. That or swim in our boxers."

Freed's face lit up at that mental image. "_Why must he tempt me so?!_" "O-Ok then. To the swimming pool it is."

_A/N: Well this happened :P Hope you enjoyed this one :)_


	4. Splash! Fail

Splash Fail!

_A/N: So its been some crazy times with stuff but I'm finally free and ready to disappoint you all with another chapter. And yes, this is a Free! reference. Hope you like it :P_

"_Now whatever happens in the pool you must remember your loyalty to the guild and the rest of the Tribe._" Freed though, sweating buckets as he and his friend waited in line to get in. "_Any inappropriate looking or actions will be...oh god he's looking at me. Think!_"

"You know we could go somewhere else if you want?" Laxus asked, quirking an eyebrow. "I only suggested this place because it was close by...ish."

By "closeish" he obviously meant that while distance wise the pool was about a five minute walk away at most, the duo had took about fifteen minutes to get there due to someone having a terrible direction and being an incredibly stubborn dragon slayer.

"No no Master Laxus all is fine!" Freed assured him. "_Say something! Anything at all!_" "I was just worried that you may kill all the fish." "_...there are no words for this failure._"

"...There are no words for how wrong that was." Laxus unknowingly agreed but cracked a smile. "But I wouldn't worry man; you guys were all fine in the hot spas am I right?"

"Y-Yes, yes we were." Freed nodded and looked away before the blonde could catch sight of his nose bleed. "_Indeed...that back massage almost killed me..._"

The people in front of them finally got waved through and the dynamic duo ventured towards the help desk and the man behind it. "Hello and welcome! Are you guys here to swim?"

"No he is here to electrocute the people and leave." Freed joked, earning him two confused looks with matching quirked eyebrows.

"Yeah we are..." Laxus answered, still looking at the rune mage. "Do you guys sell swimming stuff by the way? Just otherwise someone's gonna get one hell of a surprise."

"Well as much as I'd like to tell you no I'm afraid we do." The man at the desk smirked and gestured to the board behind him. "Which ones are you looking for?"

Now say what you will about Freed being shit at joking, but when it came to sniffing out someone hitting on his man he was better than a bloodhound. "We shall take the ones on the far left at the top. The very top."

"Ahh the knee length ones, good choice." He smiled then stood up to get them.

Laxus gave him the thumbs up of approval. "Good choice indeed. Sweet yellow stripes and stuff." He nodded to the guy. "Well he seems nice. Most of the idiots I get served by are either dicks or zombies. Kinda weird to see..."

"How much will they both be?" Freed called out, cutting off his Master's praise before it caused a murder. "_If I was in this job I would be at least thirty percent more efficient!_"

Putting the two costumes down, the employee tapped some keys on his till and sat back in his seat. "That'll be about 4000 jewels in total."

As fast as lightening Laxus had his wallet out and paid the man. "I know you too well man; no way are you paying for this on your birthday."

"Oh happy birthday!" The man smiled at Freed, getting a death glare in return. "So he's treating you to a nice day out huh?"

"Something like that." Laxus laughed and scratched his head. "Well I hardly get to just hang out with him so I figured I'd take a day to just chill with my bro here."

The man's eyes lit up. "Ohhhh so you guys are friends then?"

"Well yeah." Laxus frowned. "What else would we b-...oh. Oh its not..."

"Well when your shift ends why don't you come visit me?" The man winked.

It was at this point that Freed decided that for the sake of the man's mortality he would remove himself and Laxus from the situation. "Thank you." He said curtly before dragging his stunned boss with him.

"I...did he..."

Freed didn't even look at him. "Yes, yes he did."

"Well damn..." Laxus blinked a couple of times then smirked. "Well I guess I know why he seemed so friendly now. Poor kid."

"You can go back if you want."

Laxus stopped and looked at the steaming rune mage. "Erm...what?"

"If you wanted to take up his offer..." Freed trailed off and looked at the floor, but his head soon rose once he heard chuckling.

"Yeah see I don't really go for guys like him I'm afraid so I'll keep my number to myself for now." He told him, holding the door to the changing rooms open for Freed. "Besides I'm busy today with some green-haired nerd I know."

The wink almost killed Freed. "G-G-Good t-to know." He stuttered before practically running into the room to find, to his horror, a general changing area with no cubicals. "_Out of the frying pan and into the fire it seems. Please please please let nobody I know..._"

"Oh hey Freed, fancy seeing you here!"

"_THIS IS HOW I DIE!_" He forced a smile and turned to the approaching man. "Why hello there Jasper, how are you?"

"Fine thanks, just finished my daily swim." The man replied, fastening up his jacket. "Happy Birthday by the way! I would have brought your gift if I'd known you'd be here."

"Well sadly we both do not command time telling or mind reading properties..."

"...because we skilled strength and courage!" They finished in unison then laughed.

Laxus on the other hand just looked at them like they were the biggest dorks in the building which, to be fair, they were. "Something tells me you know each other."

Jasper looked at the dragon slayer for the first time and smiled. "Yeah we've done some RP nights together in the past. Freed is usually the DM for them and I like to derail him by doing side quests with NPCs for extra XP, but in the end its pretty fun."

Laxus blinked. "Was...was that English?"

Jasper laughed. "Sorry, I forget that Freed has 'normal friends' as well. Now lets see...tall, blonde, handsome...you're Laxus right?"

Freed could have killed him for the handsome comment. "Yes, yes this is Master Laxus. Master Laxus this is..."

"Jasper, yeah I heard. Hey." The two awkwardly shook hands before looking back at their mutual friend. "So you have to put up with him too?"

"Oh yes."

"Does he do the thing where he zones out all the time?"

"Ohhhhh yes."

"And the pedantic thing about cushion arrangement?"

"Every time before a session."

"What about where he..."

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" Freed asked before things got too embarrassing to handle. "You're always rushing around."

Jasper sighed. "Yeah I better get off shopping for the game later. Its 'Goblin Adventures 3' if you guys want in?"

Normally Freed would have been hyped for this, but considering his partner he was somewhat reserved. "I may have to decline due to..."

"Sure lets do this shit!" Laxus answered. "Hell I've never done anything like it before but I know I sure like killing goblins."

Jasper grinned. "Oh are you a fantasy gamer?"

"Nah I just get bored on a lot of my quests."

"Oh...ok. Well if you guys fancy stopping by it'll be at about 4ish or so. Now I have to dash but hopefully I will see you then!" He waved and walked out the door, but not before adding "Enjoy your date Freed."

"_His head will make a fine addition to my fireplace._" Freed scowled before quickly checking the expression on his friend's face. "_Oh thank god its that sexy smirk! Here I was panicking that..._"

"Guess your nights sorted then." Laxus quipped, finding a space to take off his shoes. "Assuming you want to go. If not we could continue our date with a candle lit dinner by the lake?"

"_...oh why must fate tempt me in this way?_" "The game will be adequate." The rune mage replied and quickly stripped down to his underwear. He took extra precautions not to look at or touch his master's body in case he had an, how shall we put this, 'overly excited response'.

Laxus on the other hand didn't give a shit. "Oh but my darling, won't you take me out in the moonlight?" He leant his now very shirtless body against his friend's and rubbed his head against Freed's. "I'll wear my best suit and we can dance until the sun rises!"

"I BELIEVE THERE IS SOMETHING IN MY NOSE!" Freed tactically roared and ran to the toilets. He made it just inside one of the toilet blocks before his nose exploded. "_Sweet Jesus I am saving that for late-...focus! Calm down and breath you fool! He is out there getting changed and this whole fiasco is very suspicious. No doubt he will be on to you before the day is over, if not already!_"

Thankfully for him Laxus was still as dense as lead. "You ok in there man? If you were feeling off I'd have stopped fucking around with you and let you sit down."

"Excuse me sir!" A man tapped the thunder god on his shoulder. "That language is not appropriate!"

"Go fuck yourself." Came the reply.

"Sir there are children present!"

Laxus looked to the man's fiver year old son, then back to him, then back to the kid. "Do I look like I give a fuck?" In his defence the child shook his head.

"Apologies, I am unsure what that was but it is dealt with now." Freed told him, appearing from the toilets with a clean nose and a considerably less clean mind.

"Good to hear buddy." The blonde smirked and patted his friend on the back whilst simultaneously flipping off the man and his son, who stormed away unamused. "Now do which trunks do you want?"

"_...shit._" Freed had not had time to factor in this decision at all. "_Well I have no idea the quality of these fabrics or their respective sizes so there is no real way to make a correct judgement based on what their expected performances will b-..._"

"Too late, I'm taking this one." Laxus shrugged and grabbed the pair nearest to him before stripping completely naked.

There are many amazing things in this world that Freed Justine had seen. The bordering mountains of Fiore and her neighbouring countries, rumoured to be one of the most serene places in the world. The first ever recorded magical spell, which held so much historical value that it was kept under armed guards at all times. The passing of the Jupiter Comet that was supposed to happen once every thousand years. However none of them compared, in his mind at least, to the naked man before him who, of course, nakedly stood with no shame with everything hanging out. "_...happy birthday Freed, happy happy birthday!_"

"Jesus this thing is tighter than expected." Laxus huffed as he pulled up his costume. "Hardly any room to breath down there if you know what I mean."

"...heh huh huh..."

"I mean the more I try to adjust the worse it gets." The thunder god absent mindedly told him.

"...aheee heee huh..."

"Maybe I should just go naked. Reckon they'd..." He looked up and caught sight of his drooling friend. "...you alive in there?"

"Can I take a picture next time?" Freed asked, still dazed.

"...What?"

The rune mage clasped both hands over his mouth and blushed fiercely. "_SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!_" "I...I...I..."

Laxus laughed. "Well you are my beloved date right? You don't have to."

It was at that moment Freed realised that by some miracle he had survived. "I...suppose not." He managed to finish before turning round again and quickly slipping into his own swim wear. "_No wonder Master Laxus' are so revealing, these are skin tight_!"

"Ok then, lets do a thing and swim and stuff." He said, gesturing to the showers.

The duo walked over and showered before they swam, giving Freed an ungodly amount of time to watch Laxus' body dripping with water. "_Best birthday ever. Best. Birthday. Ever. Of all time. Nothing will ever top this._"

"Hey what's that over there?"

Freed was snapped out of his daydreaming to what appeared to be the setting up of two goals at either end of the pool, which was considerably bigger than he expected. "It appears to be that they are setting up for water polo." He grinned. "We are just in time to play."

Laxus mimicked his grin. "Oh yes my friend, the time as come and so have we."

"Opposite teams?"

"It would be unfair otherwise."

"The usual stakes?"

"But of course."

The pair grinned at each other, competitive sparks flying between their eyes. "It's on."

_A/N: Well you'll get some more of these dorks soon enough hopefully. Hope you liked it :P_


	5. Ballin with the Boss

Ballin' with the Boss

_A/N: The clusterfuck continues!_

-_In the green corner-_

"...and therefore if they attempt this attack route we should counter with code 37B, making it impossible for them to break our defence." Freed smirked and looked at his team. "Now that explanations are over, we still have approximately three minutes before the game begins for questions. Are there any misconceptions?"

The other six players looked at each other scratching their heads. "Um...yeah...all of it."

Freed's confident smirk vanished and was quickly replaced with a frown. "But I explained the plans in great detail to..."

"Yeah that's the problem." The elected goalkeeper groaned. "We got lost after the first sentence. Can't we just play the game as it goes and have fun?"

"Absolutely not!" Freed yelled. "This game is a battle between two great masters of strategy; myself and Master Laxus. The winner will be decided by each respective commander's moves and how efficiently they are carried out. In order to win I must consider every possible option!"

"But its just a..."

"THIS IS A MATTER OF THE UTMOST IMPORTANCE AND VICTORY MUST BE ACHIEVED!" The rune mage bellowed, silencing the rest of his team. "Now I shall briefly go over our strategy again, although in the time this will take I am sure Master Laxus will have easily came up with a further ten strategies..."

_-In the yellow corner_-

"...so who's done this before? Anyone? 'Cos I've got no idea what to do."

The yellow team's members sighed in unison. "If you don't know how to play, how come you get to be the leader?"

"Because fuck you, that's why." Laxus glared at the woman before sagging his shoulders. "Look guys I don't know you and you don't know me..."

"You're Laxus Dreyar!" One of the boys squeaked.

"...but I need to kick this nerds ass or I'll never live it down. So who's with me?"

The members looked at him. "What's in it for us?"

Laxus blinked. "...you know usually I'd just beat you into doing something but today's kinda special so...um...you guys can share the prize without me?"

"You mean the crappy swimming caps and goggles they offered?"

"That's the stuff! Yeah you get my pair to fight over or something."

"...one moment." The others huddled together and discussed the situation. After a solid two minutes of talking, they broke and faced their leader. "We're in."

The Thunder God grinned. "Sweet. Now...how about we just like...I dunno. Who's fat?"

"T-That's a personal ques-..."

"Well volunteered sir, you're in goal." Before the middle aged man could complain he found himself being carried and placed by the edge of the pool. "Sorry man but its a standard school yard technique. Ok who's bulky?"

A couple of body building women tentatively raised their hands. "You're defenders. Anyone comes near this guy you punch them."

"I'm not sure that's legal in..." They started but Laxus was on a role.

"The rest of you can just swim or whatever. Pretend you're islands or something and cock block anyone coming into out half."

The remaining trio nodded, but after a brief moment of silence the all important question was asked. "Wait; who's going to be on the offensive? We have to score goals to win."

"Is that so?" Laxus' grin widened to maddening proportions. "Ohhh just you leave that to me he he he..."

"Ok so who's ready to play ball?" The referee asked, appearing out of nowhere. "Now if both teams are ready, I'd like to have their captains come into the centre of the pool."

Laxus and Freed slowly waded towards one another, glaring each other down along the way. Well, I say glaring down. Laxus basically grinned at Freed and Freed...well he did his best to not have a nose bleed. "_Water plus Master Laxus equals AMAZING VIEW! DAMN THIS BATTLE WILL BE HARD TO WIN!_"

"Ready to lose nerd?" Laxus grinned and winked at his opponent."

"_Pleeeeeease let me change the forfeit for when I do!_" Freed did his best and smirked back. "Not on this day. Enjoy defeat!"

The referee quirked an eyebrow but quickly shrugged it off. "Ok so how do you want to decide who starts with the ball? Coin flip? Rock paper scissors? Toss up?"

"Toss up." Freed boldly stated, knowing full well the connotations that he would later add to that.

The man shrugged again. "Ok, here goes."

As the ball was hurled into the air, both captains leapt as high as they could in an attempt to get the first minor advantage. The Thunder God's face contained a look of utter concentration that was only mirrored by his opponent, which led to them both effectively high fiving the ball, causing it to fly out to the side.

"Execute pattern delta!" Freed yelled at his team and they sprung into action, securing every inch of the pool as practised.

"I got this!" Laxus shouted and his team just stood around chilling as expected.

Once again both captains dived for the ball but this time the thunder god was faster, managing to secure it. "Ok so I just get this into that goal right?" His nearest team mate gave him a thumbs up. "Bitchin'." He said, cracking his neck and dashing forward...straight into a rune barrier.

"As expected." Freed laughed and revealed the maze of runes around his side of the pool. "I have placed the necessary defences to equalise your attacks. I am afraid I will be claiming victory Ma-..."

He was cut off by insane laughter. "Ohhhh Freed; so we're using magic then?"

It was at that moment Freed Justine knew he had fucked up. The following minutes consisted of manic laughter, screaming opponents and many many goals. To give the rune mage credit he gave as much as he got, but by the end of the match the scores were tied and everyone bar the Fairy Tail members had fled the pool.

"M-Match p-p-point." The referee squeaked before tossing the ball into the pool and hiding behind the sandbags.

"BRING IT BLONDY!" Freed roared, using his dark ecriture to transform into his darkness form before lunging for the ball.

"NO PROBLEM MOSS HEAD!" Laxus retorted and responded in kind. Instantly their speed increased to superhuman levels as they battled around the pool for victory. "YOUR RUNES ALWAYS SUCKED!"

"YOUR COAT LOOKS DUMB IN THE SUMMER!"

"WELL SORRY FOR BEING COOL NERD!"

"WELL YOU SHOULD BE WITH YOUR DUMB STUPID CUTE FACE AND VOICE!"

"WELL...wait what?"

"ENOUGH!" The referee screamed and pointed to the door. "You are both disqualified and barred from this pool now kindly get your things any leave!"

The pair of them froze, blinked and then let go of each other. "Um...sorry?"

"OUT!" The man yelled and the two disappeared into the changing rooms.

"So that was...fun..." Laxus started then broke down laughing. "Holy shit man we ruined that pool! All because of a stupid ball game!"

Despite feeling utterly embarrassed for his actions, Freed couldn't help chuckling. "I was unaware of how strong your desire to win was Laxus."

His friend raised an eyebrow. "Ohhh finally hitting me with first names huh? Careful now or the next thing you know you'll be wining and dining me."

"_Here is to hoping..._" Freed finished drying himself off and began putting his clothes back on with a strange sense of confidence. Maybe it was the fact he was still pumped full of adrenaline from the game that led him to make his next life changing statement. "Later perhaps, assuming you will be paying after that defeat."

Laxus blinked. "Defeat? My dear Freed that was a draw and you know it!"

"I had placed runes to prevent you from scoring..."

"...which I could have broken though with my awesome strength." The blond smiled. "Still, if its a drink you want a drink you'll get. Where works for you?"

"Your strength is indeed admi...I...I am sorry...what?"

"Where do you wanna go for a drink?"

Freed's head exploded. "_OH MY GODS WHAT JUST HAPPENED?! Did he...are we...?!_" "I...heh...well..."

Laxus sighed. "C'mon man decide at least one thing on your birthday! I mean..."

And just like that Freed's hopes were dashed again. "This is a birthday drink?"

Now had Freed paid more attention to his leader he would have noticed the slight pause and mild blush on his face, but at that moment he was too busy burning his dreams. "I...yeah man, a birthday drink. So where nearby do you fancy?"

"The nearest place that serves alcohol will be adequate." Came the reply as the rune mage finished putting his jacket on. "Despite it being early in the afternoon I feel I require one now." "_As expected Master Laxus is only here to fulfil his birthday obligations._"

"Works for me." The oblivious Thunder God grinned and patted his tormented friend's back. "Finally something I can get behind! So should we start on the shots or..."

"Shots seem reasonable." Freed replied in a sad tone that made even Laxus realise something was up. "_Perhaps if I can get drunk enough I can escape this..._"

"You know we should really do this day more often." He scratched the back of his head and put his shirt back on. "I mean...if you want and stuff?"

Freed quirked an eyebrow, breaking himself from his bad thoughts. "I...would like that."

Laxus gave him a warm look. "God its not like I enjoy spending time with my best friend or anything...even if he's a total nerd."

"I enjoy spending time with you too La-...I am your best friend?"

The lightening mage shrugged. "Well yeah idiot, who else would be? Oh...oh god no not again!"

And just like that the rainbows started shooting out of Freed's eyes. Again. It took a good few minutes to calm him down.

_A/N: Happy Halloween :)_


	6. Drinks on You

Drinks on You

_A/N: Well I'm done most of my assignments so its time to once again send this tail of dorkiness onwards and upwards!_

"Freed when this day is over we really need to talk about these...uh...episodes you keep having..." Laxus rolled his eyes as they turned the final corner before the pub. Once again Freed's spacing out had rendered him comatose, and once again Laxus had to pick up the slack and carry his friend to their destination.

"..."

"I mean I can deal with one or two but..."

"...Once again consciousness takes m-...why am I being...?"

Laxus dumped him on the floor before he could finish. "You know if I didn't know any better..."

Freed immediately jumped to his feet. "So what beverage shall we consume first?"

The lightening god sighed. "How many times do I have to tell you; its your birthday man. Pick something you like and I'll grab you it."

"O-Of course! I shall...choose...the beverage..." Freed stalled while millions of drink names and tastes ran through his head. "_Ok so Mas-...Laxus...oh yes you can call him by his first name now! You are on first name terms with the most perfect man..._"

"Uh...are you stalling?"

Freed snapped out of his stalling. "Um no, just...thinking..."

Laxus rolled his eyes. "Damn man its not the most important life decision you'll ever make. I mean as long as it gets you rekt, what does it matter?"

"_My lord he has a point! I suppose he would drink anything no matter what you suggest, so why not go for something nice? What is the worst that can happen?_" The rune mage grinned. "Well in that case we shall be drinking Martini's; shaken not stirred. It is good for forging...Bonds."

"...holy shit that is the lamest thing I have ever heard." Laxus face palmed so hard he almost broke his nose. "I mean...I just...god dammit Freed."

Instantly the green haired man regretted his decision. "Oh dear god I am so sorry Laxus that I of-..."

"Oh shit is that the geezer?!" Freed stopped and turned to see what Laxus was looking at. Sure enough a certain red haired crash mage was leaving the very pub they had intended to go to. "Hey Gildarts! How's it going?!"

The older man's shagged but he turned to face his guild mates. "Look guys I really need to..."

"Say happy birthday to Freed right?" Laxus walked over and wrapped his arm around him. "He is twenty one today after all."

Gildarts blinked. "Wait that's today? I thought you said it was..."

"Exactly today!" The blonde dug his elbow in and whispered "Just play along and we'll both escape with our integrity."

Freed was confused at what was happening, but nevertheless very thankful his failure had been forgotten. Walking slowly up to the S-Class duo he tentatively looked at the newcomer. "Good afternoon Gildarts, how are you doing?"

"I'm f-fine man. Happy Birthday and stuff! So you're like what...twenty two...?"

"Twenty one."

"...close enough. Wait no, twenty one?! Congratulations Freed you're finally a fully func-..." He stopped as he realised who he was talking to. "...a somewhat...erm...acceptable individual."

"Nice one there tact tactician." Laxus grinned. "So what's it like inside? Any spaces or not?"

Gildarts shook his head. "Pretty heaving. Nobody's at the bar but everyone's clogging the seats for some reason. In fact I was thinking of heading down the road to..."

"What about the seats outside?" Freed gestured to the many available seats of questionable quality that surrounded them. "_If we move out location then the chance that I will mess up increases exponentially! They must stay for at least one drink so nerves can be calmed!_"

Laxus shrugged. "Sounds fair to me. Well I'm getting the first round so how about you guys grab a seat and I'll go get the shots?"

"Laxus I am unsure as to whether I will be able to..."

"Ah relax Freed its your birthday!" Unhooking his arm from the older man, he strolled over and placed his hands on the birthday boy's shoulders. "Have some fun and get drunk whenever! Now what do you fancy for starters?"

Freed immediately started blushing. "_Oh god he's looking right into my eyes! With his eyes! I FORGOT HE HAD EYES OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD!_" "I...erm...well..."

"Welp I'm done waiting for shit like this. I'll bring a selection." And with that Laxus disappeared into the bar.

"Jeez so he still doesn't know then?!" Freed spun around to face the smirking crash mage. "Figured you'd have told the bone head by now."

"L-Laxus is not a...!"

"Ohhh first name terms now? Damn I better stay for a few drinks then." Gildarts' smirk widened and he took a seat at the nearest table. "Please, tell me everything."

Despite his blush growing to legendary proportions, the rune mage complied. "He...I...it has been a very...interesting day thus far."

Gildarts snorted. "Well if it was anything like the spa day I have to hear it. Gimmie the deets!"

So Freed told him about everything that happened so far. The trip to the book store, the fun they had in the park and the incredibly intense water polo game. Being the perfectionist he was he left nothing out, describing his leader in excruciating detail to the point where Gildarts regretted not ducking away when they called his name. "...and as we got changed the water flowed over Laxus' abdominal muscles it glistened in such a way that..."

"Ok ok! I get it; you're madly in love with him and you've spent the day having some kind of weird man date thing." The red head rubbed his temples and wondered what was taking the Thunder God so long. "So when are you gonna tell him how you feel?"

"Well I-I never planned o-on..."

"Dammit kid you've been in love with this guy for years! What, were you just gonna sit back and mope about for the rest of your life!?" He threw his hand up in the air. "Do you know how much my daughter ships you guys?!"

At this point the shade of Freed's blush had reached a red so pure that it was starting to warp space and time. "B-B-But h-he is into g-girls!"

"No shit!" The ensuing face palm caused a shock wave that shattered the nearby windows of many shops. "But I've known that kid since he was no taller than my knee. If that guys straight then I'm an blue octopus. Just 'cos he's never had a boyfriend doesn't mean he's against having one."

Freed quirked an eyebrow. "W-What do you mean?"

The crash mage sighed. "I me-...no, no you need to find this one out yourself. All I'm gonna do is give you a bit of a push with the best birthday present ever."

"Sorry guys that took longer than expected; trays are apparently damned elusive today." Laxus quipped, coming out the door carrying a tray filled with various shots. "So wh-..."

"Right on queue spark plug!" Gildarts stood up dramatically and pointed at the blonde. "Lie down and take your shirt off."

Laxus almost dropped the shots. "...I'm sorry what?"

"You heard me volt orb now get on the ground." The redhead took the tray from the startled man and placed it on the table. "Come on I haven't got all day!"

Freed's blush had now achieved godlike proportions and had almost gained sentience. "T-T-This i-is n-n-not n-n-n-n..."

"Fuck no man! I'm not doing something like that without..."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

"You are."

"I'm not!"

"Are."

"Dude I'm not doing it and you can't make me!"

"Laxus yes I can now get on the damned floor before I put you there."

"I...damn you." Folding his arms he reluctantly lay down on the floor. "At least tell me what I'm doing this for."

"Belly shots." Gildarts winked at the birthday boy, causing blood to erupt from his nose. "That's how I did it on my twenty first."

Critical mass was finally achieved and a small trickle of blood fell from Freed's nose. "WHAT?! I D-DID NOT...!"

"Oh I get you now!" Laxus shrugged and started unbuttoning his shirt. "Since there's no random bar staff I guess I'll have to take the burden. Wish you'd just told me this at the start though..."

"Pfft where's the fun in not putting the fear of god into you?" The crash mage laughed and picked up a shot at random. "Anyways age old traditions must be honoured!" Kneeling down, he carefully placed the drink right over the belly button of the dragon slayer before straightening back up and smiling at the ridiculous sight. "Ok Freed its all on you now."

Said Freed had receded back into his safe zone within his mind. "_This is not happening this cannot be happening oh god oh god oh ABS oh god oh god ABS AND PECS god god oh..._" Looking at the two men with him he realised there was no escape. "I...suppose I should...get this over with." Gildarts stepped back and gestured to Freed's destiny. Getting onto his knees, he arched his back and grabbed the shot with his lips, tilting his head back to drink it.

"He he that's the spirit!" The crash mage patted him on the back, causing Freed to drop the glass and start coughing. "Now I wonder which one I'll pick next..."

"NO MORE!" The rune mage sprung to his feet retreated back to his chair. "J-Just one is s-sufficient I think."

Laxus shrugged then got back on his feet. "Well suit yourself man. Shame though; kinda liked seeing your head down there."

"Indeed one was...I mean...what?"

"Aaaaaand on that bombshell I'm out." Gildarts picked up a shot, downed it and gave Freed a thumbs up. "Quests to do and people too; you know how it is. Best of luck with your birthday kid. Best of luck with everything else too. Cya!"

The duo blinked and he was gone. "Was...was he real or did we imagine him?"

Freed, as usual, was preoccupied with the new information he had received. "My head...your stomach...enjoyable...what?"

Laxus laughed. "Well its better to see your dumb face down there than some random chick."

"_...drinking at this moment is the correct decision._" Taking the closest shot to him, the rune mage downed the drink and placed the glass on the table. "I-Is that so?"

The blonde buttoned his shirt back up before downing the closest shot to him. "Damn right." Looking up at his still blushing friend, an idea came into his mind. "Hey, since you're so into asking questions why don't we play a game? For every question we ask, we take a shot. Sound good?"

With the alcohol hitting him already, Freed foolishly agreed. "So what can we ask?"

"Well that should be a shot right there but..." The rune mage immediately downed one. "...fair enough. Ask anything at all. So I guess its my turn. Erm...who was the last person you made out with?"

The answer came before the Thunder God had even picked up the drink. "A man named Larry approximately thirty seven days ago at the bar across from Piccolo's Pizza."

"Damn its been a wh-...wait, a guy? So you really are bi! I mean I always had my suspicions but..."

"I believe it is my turn!" Freed proclaimed, paying his price while Gildarts' words rang in his head. "Have you every kissed a man before?"

Laxus blinked. "Erm I...well I guess there was..."

"Answer the question in accordance to the rules!"

"Right right..." The blonde thought for a moment. "Well...yes. It was a couple of years back mind but yeah, we were both drunk and dancing and one thing led to another..."

"THAT IS SUFFICIENT DETAIL SIR!" Freed screamed, the alcohol removing practically all of his inhibitions as his body failed to handle it. He really was the definition a lightweight. "Your turn I believe."

"Ahem." Laxus cleared his throat before downing his shot. "So are you...wait no that's a stupid question. Erm...what was..."

"Actually I believe that shot accounts for the 'a guy?" question. The answer is yes. My turn." Freed grinned, confidence suddenly surging through him. "Are you currently engaged with courting in any such manner?"

"The hell does...wait, not falling for that shit again you crafty shit." The Thunder God processed the question. "Assuming you're asking if I'm dating anyone, the answer is no. Haven't been for a while. My turn again." Looking down, he noticed there were only three shots remaining. "Damn, only two left before I have to get more. Let's see..." He pondered his choices as one of the drinks went down his throat. "Ok, is there anyone you have your eye on at the moment?"

Normally Freed would have backed away into a corner right now or hid in his sacred cupboard, but the alcohol was seriously messing with him. "Indeed I have found my soul mate." Laxus quirked an eyebrow but Freed cut him off. "Tragic. Now I shall think of my question." "_...ok so consciousness is already fading so fast work must be done. Really should have improved the alcohol capacity in here...no focus! Think of a question for Laxus that would be perfect! Ohh but there are so many to choose from...what is his preferred man...would he every have a relationship with someone...did it hurt when he fell from heave-...NO FOCUS!_" He shook his head and focused on keeping his speech normal. "I o-only get one more q-question? I...OH WAIT NO!"

But it was too late. A grinning Laxus held up the one of the two remaining shots while pointing to the other. "Yes it is for this tray. Now pay up."

The alcohol hitting the back of Freed's throat almost killed him. "...damn you..."

"Last question time th-...wait, you ok?" Yes, it had taken the lightening mage this long to realise just how drunk his friend was. "You look a bit..."

"SHOT FIRST, SLEEP LATER!" Freed yelled, pointing both hands at his master and laughing. "N-now speak you beautiful man!"

"Beautiful ma-...better pay the toll then." Still being a completely clueless puppy, Laxus knew exactly what to ask, and as he finished the final shot he stood up and prepared to carry his clearly drunk friend away. "Last question; who's your soul mate then?"

"...he he its...its..." Freed had started hiccuping at the most inconvenient time in his life. "...I mean...obviously...its..." And with that he passed out.

"Ahhh Christ you can tell me later." Laxus bent down and caught him before he hit the ground. "Time to get you some help you damned lightweight." Moving his unconscious friend into the bridal position, he began walking. "Huh, wonder if I know the fucker..."

_A/N: Hope you enjoyed this and Merry Christmas :)_


End file.
